Comparison will rob you of beauty of the season YOU are in, of the unique journey YOU are on, of the courageous steps YOU take, of the big and small wins YOU make, of the story only YOU can tell. We are all on a journey - different paths, different paces, different places. We are all different. And if we compare our chapters, we'll loose the significance and purpose of the pages WE are walking out. Not only will we miss out, but so will everybody else - because no one else has your journey. No one else can tell your story. No one else can encourage others with exactly where you're at. No one else can do you.
So next time we feel tempted to fast forward our story or skip ahead to someone else's, remember your story has purpose. Your story matters. The chapter you are in is yours. No matter where others seem to be up to, your perfectly timed in your chapter. One step at a time.
Have you ever felt inadequate by comparing your chapter with someone else's?
I know I sure have. But no longer.
💜Ruth
Don't Hide What Makes You Real
"Why do we hide what makes us most beautiful? Why do we so often deny our own brokenness? If only we could embrace the very thing we try so tirelessly to conceal...If we could turn our gaze toward the people all around us, we would see that we're not that different after all. Yes, we're all broken; but not without purpose. The brokenness has the power to transform us into the most beautiful mosaic—a glorious and artful display of a life lived well and worthy of love. No need for hiding." Beautiful words from @tiffanyrowe23
Lovely friend, don't hide what makes you REAL and beautiful and unique and shine like no one else x
Look Forward With Hope
The past is in the past. What? So why do we keep bringing it up again as if it's in our future. Not letting it go, but dragging it around wherever we go. Taking it with us into new relationships, new opportunities, new situations. Wearing it as a lens we see our present and future through. And than get confused why we keep repeating the past or feeling like we're still living in it. Well of course we would if we keep holding onto it and putting it in front of each step we take instead of behind us.
But no longer. We can see the past as what it is - the past. Yes it happened, but we choose how we respond. We can choose what lessons we take from it. We choose how we define it. We choose to leave it in the past and have an unwritten future - one we get to write.
We can choose to look forward with hope, knowing that everything is possible, that our past does not define our future, that we get to create it with the choices we make. And then recreate it again with new choices. And again.
So dear friend, no matter what's happened in the past, you get to create your future. Whatever your currently facing right now won't last forever. Hold onto hope and leave the past where it belongs - in the past.
👉💙👉 What's something you've learnt or gained from something you've faced in the past? How can you take the lesson and leave the rest behind? x
💜Ruth x
Go Girl!
Go girl! Let's REBEL AGAINST our culture's unrealistic expectations of perfectionism, comparison and the constant messages of NOT ENOUGH.
Let's be our own kind of TREND SETTERS. Those who define our own worth - not based on how others see us, but because we are loved, we belong, and we are more than enough, just as we are (all always true, not matter how we feel). Those who embrace and celebrate our REAL identity and value. Those who CHOOSE the life we want to live. Those who accept ourselves and others. Those who celebrate and support others to be all they can be. Those who stand up for those who can't, for what they believe in and are passionate about. Those who chase THEIR dreams. Those who live without fear of others opinions. Those who look for beauty in everything. Those who build up not tear down. Those who embrace not exclude. Those who love not hate. Those just like you, the REAL you.
Remember, this is a daily journey. Step by step. Yes we fall. Yes we find ourselves camouflaged in our culture's norms. Yes we forget our worth. Yes we can crumple under the pressure. Yes we don't always get it right. And that's ok. That's part of the journey. Be kind to yourself as you figure it out.
>> How do/can you rebel against our culture's pressures? You go girl! We salute you 🎉👌💙😍💜👊💃.
💜Ruth x
Sparkle Like No One Else
Yes you, sweet friend sparkle like no one else... If I prescribed to the world’s idea of beauty, I am not sure how I could get out of bed in the morning. Many days I wear yoga pants, big t-shirts, and my hair in a messy bun. I get zits, my hair normally needs to be washed, more days than not I don’t wear makeup, so if I spent my time following the world’s idea of beauty, why would I get out of bed. Frankly, I would be terrified I wouldn’t match up. But each day I get up, I fight the temptation to give into the lies of the world and I remember that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and am absolutely beautiful, no matter what my physical body looks like.
Honestly, I wish I could say that everyday, every hour, every minute, I believe this truth but I don’t and frankly some days are just harder than others. Some days I fight the lies of my past life and the lies of the world.
But I remember that I am aiming for grace, not perfection and each time I remember the truth and live in the truth, that is beauty. Beauty surrounds me in the smiling faces of those who love me as my messy broken self, beauty is in the scars of battles won, beauty is living in freedom. The world lies and tells us beauty is in the face but I am hear to tell you it is in the heart. Beauty is all around you and I dare you to see it and live in it this week. Whether you are wearing sweats, a prom dress, a swim suit, a wedding gown, or pajamas, you are beautiful. And in case no one has told you today, you are absolutely beautiful inside and out just the way you are. You my friend sparkle like no one else! - MK
What Defines You
Your past struggles, heartache, and scars may have helped shape you into who you are but they do not define you. Your past may have made you stronger but it doesn’t dictate how you get to live your life. May your past tell the story of how you became who you are but may you never let it tell you who you are going to be now. - MK @marthakatestainsby
You get to choose how you see your past, what labels you give each chapter, what you gain from it, what you bring into your future and what you leave behind. It's all your choice. You define it. And you define who you are today and tomorrow.
What experiences or words have you let define you?
Sweet one, don't let your past make you bitter, trapped, worthless... You get to CHOOSE. You choose how you define those experiences, words and who you are today.
QOTD - What's one thing you've grown from or learnt through your past? What can you be thankful for? x
💜Ruth
What Lies Are Holding You Back
"For the last five years I have been in recovery from an eating disorder. When I was in the deepest darkest days of my eating disorder, beauty meant one thing, it meant being thin.
However, no matter how desperately thin I got, it was never enough. I could never see myself as beautiful, only ugly. My view of myself was defined in something temporary, in something that the world tells me is important - my size, perfection, accessories. My beauty was defined by my physical appearance, which is something that will never be perfect. It was all lies". MK
So some of the lies holding MK back were around her physical appearance
- You are beautiful when you're thin.
- You have to look like the girls in magazines to be liked.
For me, some of the lies holding me back were
- You are accepted based on how others treat you.
- You have to prove yourself and your worth to others.
- You are not enough.
- You don't belong.
- There's something wrong with you.
These lies will keep us trapped and distort our real identity and worth.
To get free from the lies, we first need to know what lies we are believing about ourselves.
So let's take some time to uncover those sneaky lies that have camouflaged themselves as reality in our mind. Talk with a friend. Write down unhelpful things you say to yourself or believe about yourself. What is holding you back? What stops you feeling free? Let's uncover these lies and start journeying to freedom.
Would you courageously share some of your lies to help others uncover theirs? And to release the power of them being hidden in shame - you have nothing to feel shamed about. We all have believed lies - they are NOT who we are. They are false. Speak it out. Let's start believing the truth. We're standing with you x
💜Ruth and the ChooseREAL Team x
Thank you MK for sharing your courageous story with us and empowering us all
Our Worth Is Not Tied To A Number
Because we need to remember that our worth and our value is not tied to a number...a number on our clothes, a number on the scale, or any number that we deem to be "perfect". xo
As someone who spent years crying in dressing rooms, stepping on the scales multiple times a day, just trying to make it to a certain size, who was always trying to achieve that "perfect number", it is not worth it and it was never enough.
I spent years in darkness and sickness because I thought those "perfect numbers" would be enough, but they weren't.
Because our worth, our beauty, our value, is not found in a number or a size. You are not valuable because of a number. You are valuable because you are YOU! You, yourself, just as you are, imperfections and unique flaws are loved, valued, and worthy! You my friend matter.
Sharing the Journey Together
Hey lovely, how's your week been? Thinking of you x
Mines been a bit up and down with sickness, extreme exhaustion, feeling unproductive, at times overwhelmed, giving into some discouraging thoughts - yep even after I wrote that post!! So then feeling hard on myself and needing to stop, be kind and speak the truth over my life - still learning with you.
This week has also had some big wins, meeting amazing people who are generously supporting the vision of this movement and standing with us, hearing incredible stories, eating food (always a plus haha), having a wonderful team to help organize our beautiful merch and resources (their hearts inspire me), and last night I ran a workshop with some beautiful girls - all unique with so much gold to share with those around them.
THIS is what I love doing - investing into their potential, peeling back the layers of limiting beliefs and self-talk that have distorted their REAL identity and worth and empowering them to see what was always there - they are whole, complete, not lacking, worthy and more than enough, just as they are! Seeing their transformation gives me the fire to keep going, to kick those audacious goals I've set to give this freedom, hope and courage to ALL girls and women everywhere. Haha, got a little carried away with that last point - just so incredibly passionate about this and LOVE journeying alongside girls and women in this message.
So why did I tell you about my week? Because we're friends. Because I wanted you to feel comfortable to share about yours. Because we're all here for each other and our story is worth sharing - no matter what chapter.
So share away lovely friend. You never know the impact of simply sharing (for you and others). Love sharing this journey together.
💜Ruth x
📷 from the beautiful @floretflower
Your Passions
Working in schools, I met with Erin, a year 6 girl who told me the popular girls told her she had to change her hair, her clothes AND her personality if she wanted to fit in. This broke my heart, she had no idea how valuable she was and was willing to trade in her REAL identity for what she thought she HAD to be. The saddest part was that she thought this was the only answer. She was about to become a clone to please others, throwing away her own interests, values, talents, goals and dreams.
Unfortunately, this is not a rare story. But this story, fired me up. That is ENOUGH! Our girls have to know their worth and value – not based on how others see them, their past, or what the media says, but because they have always been MORE THAN ENOUGH.
This is how ChooseREAL Campaign was born. I wanted to create a platform to bring freedom around the onslaught of debilitating messages of NOT ENOUGH! Encouraging girls and women to embrace and celebrate their REAL identity and value, and live the life they CHOOSE. Living out the truth that no mater what, we are MORE THAN ENOUGH, just as we are.
I am so privilege to share this journey with you as we create a shift in our culture of true acceptance (of ourselves and each other). We love the empowering community we are all creating. Thank you for what you bring.
💜Ruth
What fires you up? What are you passionate about? x
Your Story Is Worth Sharing Now
I've had so many people say, "I'll share my story when I get through this" or "when I fix that" or "when things change". But your story is ever-evolving.
Wherever you're at, NOW is the time to share your story. Crumpled pages and all.
Don't be afraid to reveal what connects us together - the real moments in life. The good, the bad, the rough, the smooth, the process. Don't hide what you're really facing from those who care.
Who can you share what's happening in this chapter of your story - sharing it helps you own it and create the themes and headings that empower you. We're all in this together.
Your story is not finished. And we can't wait to share together in the pages.
Own Your Worth
Approve of yourself. Accept yourself. Own your worth. Practice daily and you'll gradually come to realize that you never needed approval from anyone else to feel whole and happy. Only from yourself.
TRAIN THE BRAVE.
How would letting go of your concern of what others think free you to express yourself more authentically? What would you do differently if you didn't care what others may say or think?
Love this quote from our amazing advocate @margiewarrell in her new book BRAVE.
Let's Celebrate You
Pause. It's time to celebrate! Whatever step forward you have made this week - big or small. Whatever you got right. Whatever you pushed through. Whenever you didn't give up. Whatever goals you kicked. Whenever you made a difference for someone else. Whenever you were kind to yourself. Whatever you have achieved. Whatever you learnt - even through a mistake. Whenever you tried something new. Whenever you chose to be you - the real you - or even tried to discover who you really are.
Every step you take forward, let's celebrate.
Take a moment now to write down a few (or as many as you can) of the points above. Your steps to celebrate.
This will give you a boost and fresh perspective and remind you that even when it feels like you're not - you're still making progress, you're still in the game, you have worth and value. It inspires you to keep moving forward, wherever you're at.
You are winning everyday in all sorts of ways, take time to acknowledge your wins and celebrate.
Go you!!! 🎉💜🎉 Woo hoo x
I Am....
Fill in the blank. "The words "I am" are potent words; be careful what you hitch them to. The thing you're claiming has a way of reaching back and claiming you" - A.L. Kitselman
So claim your worth. Claim your REAL identity. Claim your purpose and potential. Claim your strength. Claim your dreams. Claim your progress. You are more than enough, just as you are.
Words are powerful. Comment "I'm [your name] and I'm more than enough" below. There is so much power is acknowledging your own worth and accepting yourself first. So let's be courageous together. You are amongst a squad cheering you on.
Who you can you P A S S I O N to? Tag them, share/repost, encourage those around you to claim their worth too?
Let's create a ripple effect together, changing our culture to one of COMPLETE ACCEPTANCE - of ourselves and others.
Yes we can. But it all starts with you first! x
Your Story Counts
Today is a new day, a fresh start, a chance to begin again. You don't need to be trapped by yesterday or last week or last year. You can re-write your story at any moment.
Decide to put the past in the past - behind you, instead of letting it rule your future and blocking your view of what's possible.
Take a moment to reflect on that experience that seems to linger on. What can you learn from it? What good has come out of it? How have you changed because of it?
And now move on. It does not define you, you define it - so give it a chapter title that empowers you, and turn to a fresh, new page.
You can rewrite your story at any moment. You decide what perspective you'll have, what attitudes you'll bring, what actions you'll take. And even when we mess up, we can turn to a fresh page any time, and try again.
So breathe, and choose what you want your story to say today. It's up to you. Don't let others write your story for you. Be the author.
Your story counts.
Be Different... Be Bold
What change can we make if we are just imitating everything around us.
It takes courage and strength to be the difference, to take a stand, to go against the crowd.
But here's the good news: • You have more courage and strength than you know • You will find such satisfaction and purpose when you choose to be your REAL self, and not blend in to the world • Then without even knowing it - you are influencing others, bringing freedom, hope and courage by simply being YOU.
Boldness comes with a price, but it also comes with a prize.
Be the difference you want to see. It all starts with us.
What can you do today to be a little different to the world and a little more like you? x
Owning Your Story
Each of us has a story. Unique and powerful.
But are you running from your story, trying to escape its pages from turning on you, feeling trapped under the heavy text that seems to follow you wherever you go, trying to hide it's contents, erase it's headings, stuff the scenes away in your pockets?
Your story was written with purpose. Not to be discarded, but to be treasured.
Those ripped edges, scuffed marks, missing pages, smudged text, torn covers... They do not make the story broken and worthless, but usually show one that is so loved and cherished.
Owning our stories and pasts can be hard, but it is the needed step to claim our future.
Your story has shaped who you are, it is part of you, it gives you those beautiful rays of colours and light that no one else has. It gives you insight like no one else has.
You may have felt like your story has been writing your life. But no more, own it and start writing your own ending - one that gives your freedom, hope and courage.
Quick tips to own your story - list what you have learnt from it, list how it has shaped you, see what meaning you have given to your story (is it correct?), SHARE YOUR STORY (one of the most powerful ways to own it!). You can create any future you desire. It starts with owning your story and putting the past in the past so your future is free for you to create endless possibilities!
It's your choice. We're standing with you! You have always been and will always be more than enough xx
Be You
Be Brave . Be YOU . Be Free.
Today, BE BRAVE by stepping out of the unrealistic expectations of others, the pressures to be what other people want, to prove ourselves.
And just BE YOU. Be real (whatever that means for you), celebrate your unique qualities, embrace your imperfections, be true to your own values and interests, be whoever YOU want to be.
And BE FREE! Free of comparison, striving, people-pleasing. Free to dream again, to do what you really love, to give generously, share authentically, encourage others in their journey.
You've totally got this! It doesn't matter if you don't get it all right, one step in this direction is a big win! What can you do today to be a little braver, a little more of you, and a little freer? One step x
Your Story has a Purpose
Own YOUR story, not one you wish you had. Maybe you think yours is not as sparkly as someone else's or not adventurous enough or too damaged. These are lies.
Your story is yours, and should be celebrated just as it is - no edits or re-takes. The past cannot be changed, but the future is full of new possibilities. Your story has incredible purpose. Your story is a foundation (even the bad right now will one day seem essential to your purpose). Your story can empower others.
Your story is worth being shared. It can take vulnerability and courage, but that's where the magic happens and you begin to OWN YOUR STORY, instead of your story owning you. And it all starts with sharing it honestly.
Who in your life is a safe person to start the conversation? Share a snippet of your journey. Share the one thing that's holding you back or that you've locked away in the deepest parts of your mind - share that and begin to feel freed. Your story has purpose x
