Comparison will rob you of beauty of the season YOU are in, of the unique journey YOU are on, of the courageous steps YOU take, of the big and small wins YOU make, of the story only YOU can tell. We are all on a journey - different paths, different paces, different places. We are all different. And if we compare our chapters, we'll loose the significance and purpose of the pages WE are walking out. Not only will we miss out, but so will everybody else - because no one else has your journey. No one else can tell your story. No one else can encourage others with exactly where you're at. No one else can do you.
So next time we feel tempted to fast forward our story or skip ahead to someone else's, remember your story has purpose. Your story matters. The chapter you are in is yours. No matter where others seem to be up to, your perfectly timed in your chapter. One step at a time.
Have you ever felt inadequate by comparing your chapter with someone else's?
I know I sure have. But no longer.
💜Ruth
Don't Hide What Makes You Real
"Why do we hide what makes us most beautiful? Why do we so often deny our own brokenness? If only we could embrace the very thing we try so tirelessly to conceal...If we could turn our gaze toward the people all around us, we would see that we're not that different after all. Yes, we're all broken; but not without purpose. The brokenness has the power to transform us into the most beautiful mosaic—a glorious and artful display of a life lived well and worthy of love. No need for hiding." Beautiful words from @tiffanyrowe23
Lovely friend, don't hide what makes you REAL and beautiful and unique and shine like no one else x
Note to Self: I CAN
Oh yes you can girl! Don't let "I can't!" be a part of your vocabulary. You can do so much more than you know. Give things a go, take risks, learn from mistakes, try again, keep going, get help, try again, keep going, get help, try again, keep going, get help... A lot of the time we can't do things straight away, and that's normal. But the more we practice, the more we keep going, eventually we look back and say, "wow, I thought this was too hard at the time, but I did it!!!" x
- What's something you can look back on and say, "I did it!"? We'd love to celebrate with you
- What's something you regularly find yourself saying "I can't!" about? Let's get clear about what these are so we can look out for them next time and snip off that T >> I CAN!
We believe in you x
💜Ruth + ChooseREAL Team x
What Defines You
Your past struggles, heartache, and scars may have helped shape you into who you are but they do not define you. Your past may have made you stronger but it doesn’t dictate how you get to live your life. May your past tell the story of how you became who you are but may you never let it tell you who you are going to be now. - MK @marthakatestainsby
You get to choose how you see your past, what labels you give each chapter, what you gain from it, what you bring into your future and what you leave behind. It's all your choice. You define it. And you define who you are today and tomorrow.
What experiences or words have you let define you?
Sweet one, don't let your past make you bitter, trapped, worthless... You get to CHOOSE. You choose how you define those experiences, words and who you are today.
QOTD - What's one thing you've grown from or learnt through your past? What can you be thankful for? x
💜Ruth
What Lies Are Holding You Back
"For the last five years I have been in recovery from an eating disorder. When I was in the deepest darkest days of my eating disorder, beauty meant one thing, it meant being thin.
However, no matter how desperately thin I got, it was never enough. I could never see myself as beautiful, only ugly. My view of myself was defined in something temporary, in something that the world tells me is important - my size, perfection, accessories. My beauty was defined by my physical appearance, which is something that will never be perfect. It was all lies". MK
So some of the lies holding MK back were around her physical appearance
- You are beautiful when you're thin.
- You have to look like the girls in magazines to be liked.
For me, some of the lies holding me back were
- You are accepted based on how others treat you.
- You have to prove yourself and your worth to others.
- You are not enough.
- You don't belong.
- There's something wrong with you.
These lies will keep us trapped and distort our real identity and worth.
To get free from the lies, we first need to know what lies we are believing about ourselves.
So let's take some time to uncover those sneaky lies that have camouflaged themselves as reality in our mind. Talk with a friend. Write down unhelpful things you say to yourself or believe about yourself. What is holding you back? What stops you feeling free? Let's uncover these lies and start journeying to freedom.
Would you courageously share some of your lies to help others uncover theirs? And to release the power of them being hidden in shame - you have nothing to feel shamed about. We all have believed lies - they are NOT who we are. They are false. Speak it out. Let's start believing the truth. We're standing with you x
💜Ruth and the ChooseREAL Team x
Thank you MK for sharing your courageous story with us and empowering us all
Progress Over Perfection
The illusion of perfection is that it will be everything you’ve ever wanted and more. Perfection says, that suddenly when you get there all will be right. However, what perfection doesn’t tell you is that it is not real. Nope not one thing about perfection is real. It's impossible. It can never be attained.
So what if today you strived for progress over perfection? What if you believed that first step was a big deal, that small change was actually huge? What if you believed that progress was even better than perfection? When progress becomes the goal over perfection you allow a whole more light and beauty to seep in to your life.
Instead of always feeling like you're constantly failing, you allow yourself to actually WIN - every step you make. Instead of being so focused on getting it right, you allow yourself to actually enjoy the journey - messes and all.
So let's aim for progress and celebrate each step. What's a step you can celebrate from last week with us? x
You Are Not Alone
Been there for sure and actually feeling it right now... For no particular reason, I've just been feeling flat lately. Maybe because I've been sick for weeks. Maybe because sometimes progress is just really slow. Maybe because I've been waiting for some really big provisions and dreams that haven't happened yet. Maybe because I'm really exhausted. Maybe because I haven't made time to get out in nature. Maybe because some of my friends are facing huge challenges and I can't fix it for them. Maybe because I haven't been sleeping well. Maybe because everything feels cluttered. Maybe because this journey can be lonely at times. Maybe because of some disappointments. Maybe because of all these things together. Or maybe because it's just one of those days.
I'm not sure where you're at, but lovely one, know that wherever you're at right now is ok and you are not alone. We all struggle, we all face challenges and change. We all have emotions and feelings and thoughts and don't always know how to cope with them.
And even if we do, we don't always do what we know is best for us - yep me.
So let me encourage you in my struggle... No matter what you're facing or feeling, you are not alone. And this won't last forever. You CAN get through this. And we're standing with you.
Do something that will bring you rest, refresh you, put a smile on your face, re-energize you. When we are just focusing on the struggle, that's all we'll experience. So try and lift your gaze to search for all the blessings around you, be thankful, give to others, encourage someone else, remember the purpose, do things you love.
For me, I'm thinking a hot bubble bath, cooking delicious food, talk with a friend and get an early night. And I really need to clean haha.
We need to be kind to ourselves, especially when things are hard. What can you do to take care of yourself today? What is something you love doing? What is one practical thing you can do to take action in your struggle? What is something you are thankful for? Take time out for you x
💜Ruth
What Are You Choosing
What are you choosing today? It's totally up to you. You get to choose your attitude, your perspective, your words, your actions, your mindset, and who you will be today.
It's all up to you. You can choose the REAL you, not based on what you think others want, but who you really want to be.
You can choose to be thankful, to see past the challenges and into the opportunities, to be kind to everyone (including yourself), to look for the good in others, to get a fresh perspective. You've got the power x
So what do YOU CHOOSE? It can be helpful to say it out aloud. And yes, we stuff up and don't always get it right and forget what we choose. But that's ok, just keep choosing. Maybe write it down and put it somewhere to remind yourself. You've got this x
📷taken by the lovely @thepaperfox for us
How Are You Seeing Yourself
Don't let the opinions of others define you darling. They are opinions, ideas and judgements, not facts, not truth.
Is it even our business what they think? That's just their personal view. And we all have a million opinions about everything - so many uninformed.
We can never control how others see us but we can choose how we see ourselves.
So let's focus on what we can control and see ourselves as the beautifully amazing human beings we are, with so much to offer those around us and so much potential within us.
Make the switch. Who's opinions do you need to stop worrying about? It's not your business what they think anyways, it's just thoughts.
And how are you seeing yourself? What's one thing you admire about yourself? Embrace it lovely x
See Your Worth
"On the days you compare yourself to someone else. On the days you burst into tears several times because you are unhappy with your reflection in the mirror. On the days you wonder what is your purpose and on the days when someone isn't kind to you. On these days you need to remember that who you are comparing yourself to is making comparisons to someone else. On these days you need to remind yourself we all have these days. On these days you need to give yourself a break. On these days you need to know just how worthy you are and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise.” Love this from our sisters at @thegirlcampaign.
You are more than enough, just as you are.
If you need help seeing your own worth, you’re in good company and we’re here to journey with you through the process. Not an overnight pill, but daily choices to believe the truth about who you really are. You are worthy. We’re all in it together x
Choose Your Focus
So your week might not have worked out like you planned (mine certainly didn't). But that doesn't mean today can't be a brand new day. And even if those circumstances haven't changed or even get worse, there's still always a reason to say YAY.
You may feel flat and disappointed (like me), or even worse, but we still have something that can never be taken away - to CHOOSE OUR ATTITUDE / FOCUS / ACTIONS.
And really, I want to have a great day, so I'm letting go of what's happened and what didn't happen and choosing to find the good in what's right in front of me. Being thankful for where I am right now. Looking for moments to whisper YAY! Today, no matter what happens, I want to end it saying yay > even for the smallest of things.
What are you wanting to focus on today? What attitude are you choosing? x
Remember, no matter what's happened, you are MORE THAN ENOUGH! 💜Ruth x
P.S. If you feel you can't choose your attitude, there's no hope, why bother >> don't struggle alone, reach out, we're here for you, there's always a way, and it's ok not to be ok right now. Just don't do it alone. Your story is worth sharing and not over yet x
📷omghow
Own Your Worth
Approve of yourself. Accept yourself. Own your worth. Practice daily and you'll gradually come to realize that you never needed approval from anyone else to feel whole and happy. Only from yourself.
TRAIN THE BRAVE.
How would letting go of your concern of what others think free you to express yourself more authentically? What would you do differently if you didn't care what others may say or think?
Love this quote from our amazing advocate @margiewarrell in her new book BRAVE.
You Are You
Love this. Be careful what you are speaking over your life. Labels aren't helpful. They don't give you freedom to move and change. They don't speak truth. Don't box yourself in.
Speak truth. Speak life. Speak freedom.
You are NOT your past. You have a past, we all do. You are NOT your struggles. You have struggles, we all do. You are NOT your fears. You have fears, we all do. You are NOT your mistakes, you make mistakes, we all do. You are NOT your weakness. You have weaknesses, we all do. You are NOT your experiences, you have experiences, we all do.
You are you. Don't let these things define you. Allow them to teach you, grow you, inspire you.
Start afresh this week, knowing you can be whoever you choose to be - labels free x
Adventuring Upstream
So, I've been struggling with exhaustion, busyness and being overwhelmed, and constantly speaking this over my life - "I am so exhausted, I am so busy, everything is so hard and overwhelming" etc.
I know how powerful our words and mindset are. And yet, I kept speaking this over my life. If this is what I'm proclaiming and focusing on, then that is exactly what I am going to experience. How can I experience anything else?
But enough is enough. I don't want to experience that anymore. And I'm sure you don't either.
The words we speak over our lives are so powerful. Often we need to re-word & re-frame how we say things.
So I have decided to RE-WORD and RE-FRAME these challenges.
Instead of "I'm so tired / exhausted"... I
I am being STRETCHED to GROW.
I am being REFILLED and STRENGTHENED.
Instead of "I'm so busy"... I
I am PURPOSEFUL and ALERT and ACTIVE.
I am HIGHLY ENGAGED and ACTIVE.
Instead of "It's too too hard / overwhelming"... I
This is a REFINING CHALLENGE.
I am ADVENTURING UPSTREAM.
I am BRAVING ENDLESS POSSIBILITIES.
I hope this encourages you wherever you're at.
If you find you keep speaking words over your life that don't help, that hold you back, make you feel trapped and discouraged... Try re-wording and re-framing them too. If these ones speak to you, feel free to use them or find words that would empower you in the challenges.
Maybe you want to reword the way you see yourself? Or how you handle challenges? Or your constant complaints?
This is an opportunity to learn something and grow.
I am strong enough to get through this.
I am more than enough, just as I am.
I am so worth loving.
This might seem impossible, but there's always a way.
Speak life. You've got this.
What Will You Choose to Focus On
"Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you." Ralph Marston
You choose how you see your circumstances. You choose how you're going to react. You choose what you're going to focus on. You choose what/who you're going to listen to. You choose what you're going to give back. You choose who you're going to be. You choose what legacy you're going to leave. You choose how you treat yourself. You to turn challenges into opportunities. You choose your actions. You choose what you whisper to yourself. You choose how you'll approach this day. You choose your perspective. You choose your attitude. You have choice. You have the power. You choose.
SO what are you going to choose today?
Say it aloud!! Choose what empowers you. It's ok, sometimes we get it wrong. BUT we get to make another choice. So try again. Don't give up. You choose x
p.s. LOVE this photo from behind the scenes at our tee photoshoot. When girls just wanna have fun! Love the freedom and joy in their faces. It's a choice. They could have sat around bored and waiting for the time to pass in between, but instead searched out fun, found this random trolley and had "one of the best days ever". You can create anything in any circumstance... It starts with a choice x
I Am....
Fill in the blank. "The words "I am" are potent words; be careful what you hitch them to. The thing you're claiming has a way of reaching back and claiming you" - A.L. Kitselman
So claim your worth. Claim your REAL identity. Claim your purpose and potential. Claim your strength. Claim your dreams. Claim your progress. You are more than enough, just as you are.
Words are powerful. Comment "I'm [your name] and I'm more than enough" below. There is so much power is acknowledging your own worth and accepting yourself first. So let's be courageous together. You are amongst a squad cheering you on.
Who you can you P A S S I O N to? Tag them, share/repost, encourage those around you to claim their worth too?
Let's create a ripple effect together, changing our culture to one of COMPLETE ACCEPTANCE - of ourselves and others.
Yes we can. But it all starts with you first! x
Treasure Within
We all have beautiful treasures within. Rare, unlike anyone else. The best way to discover and develop them is by sharing with others.
Your treasure complements mine! And mine complements yours.
It's not a competition but a collaborative masterpiece... When we bring all our treasures together, my goodness, the world sparkles brightly.
Let's be treasure finders. Not treasure hoarders. Let's be treasure celebrators. Not treasure critics. Let's be treasure sowers, treasure growers, treasure extractors.
We all have many, sometimes we just have to do a little digging to find out what we're really made of. And look past some of the rocks that may be holding people back from revealing their treasures.
Challenges have a way of bringing treasures to the surface / but they can also quench them. Let's use them as opportunities to discover our strengths, perseverance, courage, bravery, vulnerabilities, unique gifts and talents, characteristics, power, dreams, innate worth and value, inner beauty.
Discover and celebrate the treasures in others this week. Share your treasures too.
Image by @micigirls
Our Influence
Loved being amongst thousands of young leaders discovering what it means to MASTER THE LITTLE at the National Young Leaders Day thanks to @halogenaus
Everyone is a leader and influences those around them. Will we influence for the better?
It's all about mastering the little. Small steps, day by day. Practice. Again and again. Things don't usually happen overnight, but overtime.
Little things add up to create BIG things.
Some top tips from the day to master the little: Start where you are. Just choose one little thing to move one step closer to your goal... Not 100 leaps. But one first step. Then another.
Its about daily, consistent choices and actions.
Stay the course. It can get tough, but keep going. Each step counts.
Your daily choices matter.
Be known for integrity - honest and trustworthy character, doing what you say, saying what you mean, doing the right thing.
Know that you are more than you think you are - sometimes we limit ourselves because of how we see or think about ourselves. There's so much more potential and ability in all of us. Sometimes it has to be awakened... Usually discovered in challenges or through continual practice.
Stay brave. Keep trying. Don't give up. Fall down and get back up.
Believe in yourself - you've got this.
What little thing are you wanting to master at the moment? What's your next little step?
From Competing to Completing
Shift your focus - FROM competing, comparing and criticizing others TO completing, complementing and connecting with others.
Instead of finding ways to make yourself look good, look for the good in others.
Instead of trying to prove yourself, stop and remember you are enough.
Instead of comparing with those around you, celebrate each others’ strengths, unique characteristics and value. Their strengths, do not diminish yours, but add to you - we all need each other.
Instead of feeling threatened by others, see them as opportunities to grow, learn and connect.
Instead of tearing down, let’s build others up.
Who can you encourage today and find a way to add value to their life? Complete NOT compete.
We all have something to offer x
What are You Speaking Over Your Life
"Let's speak to ourselves the way we speak to our loved ones" - Brene Brown. What words are you speaking over your life and others? Are you building up or tearing down? Are you imparting confidence or stealing it? Are you speaking truth or lies? Are you helping or hindering? Are you rejoicing or rejecting? Are you encouraging or criticizing? Are you speaking life or death/destruction? x
Your words and thoughts have such power. Let's make a conscious effort to speak worth, value, strength, understanding, kindness, encouragement, hope over our own lives and those around us.
What we say to ourselves affects how we connect with others, and what we say to others affects how we relate to ourselves.
So let's use our words to empower ourselves and those around us.
Repeat with us:
I am / you are loved and valued.
I am / you are wanted and belong.
I am / you are strong.
I am / you are capable of amazing things - and capable to face the little constant things too.
I have / you have infinite worth.
I am / you are smart and able to make decisions that empower me.
I am / you are brave.
I have / you have purpose.
I am / you are MORE THAN ENOUGH.
Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Everyday as you will be rewiring your thought patterns / brain.
You can also write your own list! Share with us to encourage others and take a stand for yourself. We are standing with you x
